Hey guys. It has been a long time since my last post. My last post "CRRI sickness" got quite a good response and so i thought i wanted to take a break on a high. And at the same time i was too busy doing dumb shit that i kept on forgetting to do my next post.
Now what is the most hot medical related news in India at the moment? No! its not Ebola. Its even worse....The NEET exam. So i feel its time i gave my truthful and slightly retarded views about this. aaaw Here goes
******
For those who dont know that the NEET exam allow me to explain (because i asked my friend about it only a few days back) This is an exam which you write after year after your internship. These marks will be taken into consideration for your postgraduation seat. So if you get low marks that will affect your chances. Me:"so what happens if you mess up your NEET exam ?"..my friend:"JUST DONT! thats it!"
So thats why i prefer to call the NEET exam as the NUAF exam - "Now Ur All F*cked" exam.
Literally its something nobody can escape from. I would like to think of yhr NUAF exam as a form of Equality. Let you be the son of a farmer who sold his favourite cow to get an MBBS seat or the daughter of a drug Lord who sold cocaine in Mexico to pablo for the medical seat...you are all screwed. Nomatter who you are or how powerful your uncle is......you must bend over. Boy:"Hey! my father is the CM!"...Government: "I don't give a shit! and once im done with you you wont be able to!"
The truth is NUAF is like the an free complimentary outmeal cookie given in Subway. Nobody likes it but we have to take it in. Nobody likes it. -
Students will think "Oh crap another exam"
Parents are thinking "Oh shit. Hope he doesnt screw this exam up"
Professors are correcting some million papers thinking "Be a medical professor they said....its a noble profession they said"
Once specific reason we students hate it is because after we thought that we have no more exams after passing final year MBBS....then this pops up. Actually that feeling doesnt exist in Medicine "Yes! No more studying!" Well have some exam or the other. Our life is made of Semesters! The correct dialogue is "Woohoo. No more studying for this year....hopefully" It still sucks though that out of the 100 exams we now have this new one to deal with. Daim! That is a lot of exams fees for the government (and for us ;)) The scenario will literally be
1. Friend: "Dude what plans for yr salary man!...Friend 2:Exam fees and blue pen and long scale for the exam!
2. Boyfriend to girlfriend :" Ive got the best romantic gift for you. Ive paid your exam fees! Happy Anniversary!
3. Father:"What to you mean your taking a break? When i was 40 years old i used to study 12 hours a day! You're 20! You should study more!"....son:"12 hours?! I dont even think i stay awake that long in a day"
One of these dialogues happened to me. (im sure you can find out which one ;))
Colleges hate it the most. The NUAF exam stopped them from doing underground black money deals for medical seats. That means they are losing a looot of cash.So dont be surprised if you start finding ward equipment or a few ambulances or even a building missing in the college because they had to sell it.
If we are to see the very minor positives of the NUAF exam. Heres one. Imagine you are a studious person and you sat and slogged it off every year. Losing your hair and you sanity for every exam. Then you see this rich kid who just somehow passes every exam by some influence or heaven knows what. So it must really irritate you that while you study before an exam hes drunk in the next room. Well.....not anymore. He screwed too because of NUAF" Justice is served. Now you know how innocent civilians feels when BATMAN saves them.
Also this is maybe good for students whos father's are really famous doctors. (i wonder who that is) This is how the dinner side conversation would go after the exam.
Son:"Dad how much was yr NEET exam marks.
Dad: "We didnt have it that time when i was studying
Son:"wohoho! thats so sad. haha. looks like i have something you dont have. Mummy ill take the big piece of chicken instead of Dad today. I deserve it....*munch*
Oh btw this is a joke. Don't even dream of doing this. The man is a doctor. If he can save a life quickly he can take your life even quicker. Your dad will kill you and then he'll resuscitate you back to life and then will say "Say that one more time. I dare you....*biting chicken piece*
Oh? My personal view about the NUAF exam. The people who are most scared about failing or getting low marks are the ones who havent failed or got low marks. hahahah. So im not a bit scared :). All I can say about the exam is.....*taking vodka shot*...." BRING IT ON!....*collapsing on the floor*
Now what is the most hot medical related news in India at the moment? No! its not Ebola. Its even worse....The NEET exam. So i feel its time i gave my truthful and slightly retarded views about this. aaaw Here goes
******
For those who dont know that the NEET exam allow me to explain (because i asked my friend about it only a few days back) This is an exam which you write after year after your internship. These marks will be taken into consideration for your postgraduation seat. So if you get low marks that will affect your chances. Me:"so what happens if you mess up your NEET exam ?"..my friend:"JUST DONT! thats it!"
So thats why i prefer to call the NEET exam as the NUAF exam - "Now Ur All F*cked" exam.
Literally its something nobody can escape from. I would like to think of yhr NUAF exam as a form of Equality. Let you be the son of a farmer who sold his favourite cow to get an MBBS seat or the daughter of a drug Lord who sold cocaine in Mexico to pablo for the medical seat...you are all screwed. Nomatter who you are or how powerful your uncle is......you must bend over. Boy:"Hey! my father is the CM!"...Government: "I don't give a shit! and once im done with you you wont be able to!"
The truth is NUAF is like the an free complimentary outmeal cookie given in Subway. Nobody likes it but we have to take it in. Nobody likes it. -
Students will think "Oh crap another exam"
Parents are thinking "Oh shit. Hope he doesnt screw this exam up"
Professors are correcting some million papers thinking "Be a medical professor they said....its a noble profession they said"
Once specific reason we students hate it is because after we thought that we have no more exams after passing final year MBBS....then this pops up. Actually that feeling doesnt exist in Medicine "Yes! No more studying!" Well have some exam or the other. Our life is made of Semesters! The correct dialogue is "Woohoo. No more studying for this year....hopefully" It still sucks though that out of the 100 exams we now have this new one to deal with. Daim! That is a lot of exams fees for the government (and for us ;)) The scenario will literally be
1. Friend: "Dude what plans for yr salary man!...Friend 2:Exam fees and blue pen and long scale for the exam!
2. Boyfriend to girlfriend :" Ive got the best romantic gift for you. Ive paid your exam fees! Happy Anniversary!
3. Father:"What to you mean your taking a break? When i was 40 years old i used to study 12 hours a day! You're 20! You should study more!"....son:"12 hours?! I dont even think i stay awake that long in a day"
One of these dialogues happened to me. (im sure you can find out which one ;))
Colleges hate it the most. The NUAF exam stopped them from doing underground black money deals for medical seats. That means they are losing a looot of cash.So dont be surprised if you start finding ward equipment or a few ambulances or even a building missing in the college because they had to sell it.
If we are to see the very minor positives of the NUAF exam. Heres one. Imagine you are a studious person and you sat and slogged it off every year. Losing your hair and you sanity for every exam. Then you see this rich kid who just somehow passes every exam by some influence or heaven knows what. So it must really irritate you that while you study before an exam hes drunk in the next room. Well.....not anymore. He screwed too because of NUAF" Justice is served. Now you know how innocent civilians feels when BATMAN saves them.
Also this is maybe good for students whos father's are really famous doctors. (i wonder who that is) This is how the dinner side conversation would go after the exam.
Son:"Dad how much was yr NEET exam marks.
Dad: "We didnt have it that time when i was studying
Son:"wohoho! thats so sad. haha. looks like i have something you dont have. Mummy ill take the big piece of chicken instead of Dad today. I deserve it....*munch*
Oh btw this is a joke. Don't even dream of doing this. The man is a doctor. If he can save a life quickly he can take your life even quicker. Your dad will kill you and then he'll resuscitate you back to life and then will say "Say that one more time. I dare you....*biting chicken piece*
Oh? My personal view about the NUAF exam. The people who are most scared about failing or getting low marks are the ones who havent failed or got low marks. hahahah. So im not a bit scared :). All I can say about the exam is.....*taking vodka shot*...." BRING IT ON!....*collapsing on the floor*
