Right. Its been quite sometime since my last post. Ok believe it or not my college life is coming to end. (About bloody time). So in the future incase forget all the cute and retarded details I just want to post it. So this is gonna be a 2 part special. So this will be useful for any kids who are just going to join college. This will tell them in detail who to stay the f*ck away from. This is based on the people i have met in my college life so if any of the characters are resembling you.....it definitely wasnt coincidental. I had you in mind. Ok...here goes
The Various characters you will meet in college are
1.The Hyped up Hot Girl:
Every class has the hot girl. El Senorita! Va va voom! Da bomb. You know the ony girl which every senior talks about. The girl which makes random people just propose to her. The girl who has a group of guys follow her in a car like the presidential bodyguards. But whats the funny part about her is....she wont look thaaaat good. Heck i mean she looks good but for all this madness. naaa. Shell look just normal. Not like as they say. In fact all her female classmates and seniors will be like "For her? All this buildup for her?! Am i missing something? What is it these guys are seeing?!" but then again a woman never admits that another woman looks good so thats another problem. Even the girl itself will be like "They all following me? Im hot? nice! Since when?"
Guys wont be complaining too much. Theyll be like "She aint got a beard so shes a girl. Good enough for me."
2.The delusional Stud:
Everybodys attention please! This guy is the ladies man. This guy has all the ladies looking at him. The guy has every boyfriend insecure. People hate this guy not because they dont like him but because their girlfriends like him. Wooo! The only problem is........none of that bullshit is true. Hes just imagining it. Some 2 girls will talk to him at a time and he thinks he's Tom cruise. Well i dont think these guys are too bad. Its a good attitide. Hey its better being like this than being depressed like someother people
3.The Alcoholic Drug Addict:
This is the guy who first admits that hes drunk alcohol or hes taken a joint. He would have maybe just taken a glass or just a bottle. Thats all. He barely has any alcohol content in his body. but apparantly when your in first year this is actually a big deal and people actually will look at him in awe. They consider him as the "bad company" which parents would have warned you about before you joined college. The interesting part is that the people who criticised him for drinking will slowly start drinking the next year and will will start drinking waaay more than him. The law of college is - When you join college only some 5 guys will have drinking habits....but when you're leaving college. Only some 5 guys wont have drinking habits.
4. The Everyones Uncle:
You will see one guy in the class who looks twice your size. Facial hair all over and hair everywh....you get the idea. he'll look like an uncle your dad met at a new year party. Itll be like he drank a bottle of testosterone before joining college.
You will think "Woah! Puberty hit this dude haaard!" Dont worry kids. He looks 30....because he is 30. He would hv finished a degree and then changed his mind and done another course. So dont freak out and start shaving everyday so that you get a beard. Sounds retarded but trust me...ive seen things.
5.The Nerd:
The nerd! What is a class without the class nerd. The one dude who actually does nothing but study. Hey! im not saying If you study well it doesnt make you a nerd.Ive nothing against people studying well but if you do nothing in college life but study then ya amigo! you a nerd ! You may be making your parents proud but I'm sure theres a small twang of disappointment within your dad. You may feel that this guy will have no sex life but wait and waaatch. During the exam time he will be surrounded by girls asking him doubts. So add this to barneys blog - Studying makes you score bro.
6.The wannabe nerds:
Now these are mostly girls but there arr guys. Some people get scared for tests. Theyll start complaining saying "uhuho. theres only 2 weeks left" Theyll delete their WhatsApp. Stop talking to people. Get stressed. Lose hair. Cry to parents. Stop eating. Go to the library. lose more hair.........and they still fail. In fact the dudes who drink before the exam just wake up...recover from their hangover and then borrow a book and study for an hr and go to the exam.....and they still fail (no clue why i said that). But these people are lucky because they gave such an impression they studied and so parents dont kill them.
Me on the other hand...one look of my dumb (fabulous) smiling face after i fail a test just makes them want to punch my teeth off.
7.The Legend:
*drumroll* This person who can never choose to see. He chooses to see you. You would have seen him for the first few days of college. After that he would have just cut a few classes a day, then a few days a week, and then a few weeks a month. Infact when you see him enter the class (maybe because of a power cut at his house) There will be a shocked silence in class and people all start whispering amongst themselves (and some people asking "who is he?. Shit! hes our class?!") Buuut We all have this admiration for him during exams. We all standing there scared, wearing our formals with neat haircuts and revising with every second we have. (like its going to make a difference) Whereas this dude is just standing there hungover with jeans...crocs...long hair and a beard. While you guys revising he'll be playing clash of clans with an even more intense expression......ironically he'll pass the exam. Dont ask me how
Dont go anywhere because ill be back with.....
*Part 2* Scenarios which happen in college....coming soon
Every class has the hot girl. El Senorita! Va va voom! Da bomb. You know the ony girl which every senior talks about. The girl which makes random people just propose to her. The girl who has a group of guys follow her in a car like the presidential bodyguards. But whats the funny part about her is....she wont look thaaaat good. Heck i mean she looks good but for all this madness. naaa. Shell look just normal. Not like as they say. In fact all her female classmates and seniors will be like "For her? All this buildup for her?! Am i missing something? What is it these guys are seeing?!" but then again a woman never admits that another woman looks good so thats another problem. Even the girl itself will be like "They all following me? Im hot? nice! Since when?"
Guys wont be complaining too much. Theyll be like "She aint got a beard so shes a girl. Good enough for me."
2.The delusional Stud:
Everybodys attention please! This guy is the ladies man. This guy has all the ladies looking at him. The guy has every boyfriend insecure. People hate this guy not because they dont like him but because their girlfriends like him. Wooo! The only problem is........none of that bullshit is true. Hes just imagining it. Some 2 girls will talk to him at a time and he thinks he's Tom cruise. Well i dont think these guys are too bad. Its a good attitide. Hey its better being like this than being depressed like someother people
3.The Alcoholic Drug Addict:
This is the guy who first admits that hes drunk alcohol or hes taken a joint. He would have maybe just taken a glass or just a bottle. Thats all. He barely has any alcohol content in his body. but apparantly when your in first year this is actually a big deal and people actually will look at him in awe. They consider him as the "bad company" which parents would have warned you about before you joined college. The interesting part is that the people who criticised him for drinking will slowly start drinking the next year and will will start drinking waaay more than him. The law of college is - When you join college only some 5 guys will have drinking habits....but when you're leaving college. Only some 5 guys wont have drinking habits.
4. The Everyones Uncle:
You will see one guy in the class who looks twice your size. Facial hair all over and hair everywh....you get the idea. he'll look like an uncle your dad met at a new year party. Itll be like he drank a bottle of testosterone before joining college.
You will think "Woah! Puberty hit this dude haaard!" Dont worry kids. He looks 30....because he is 30. He would hv finished a degree and then changed his mind and done another course. So dont freak out and start shaving everyday so that you get a beard. Sounds retarded but trust me...ive seen things.
5.The Nerd:
The nerd! What is a class without the class nerd. The one dude who actually does nothing but study. Hey! im not saying If you study well it doesnt make you a nerd.Ive nothing against people studying well but if you do nothing in college life but study then ya amigo! you a nerd ! You may be making your parents proud but I'm sure theres a small twang of disappointment within your dad. You may feel that this guy will have no sex life but wait and waaatch. During the exam time he will be surrounded by girls asking him doubts. So add this to barneys blog - Studying makes you score bro.
6.The wannabe nerds:
Now these are mostly girls but there arr guys. Some people get scared for tests. Theyll start complaining saying "uhuho. theres only 2 weeks left" Theyll delete their WhatsApp. Stop talking to people. Get stressed. Lose hair. Cry to parents. Stop eating. Go to the library. lose more hair.........and they still fail. In fact the dudes who drink before the exam just wake up...recover from their hangover and then borrow a book and study for an hr and go to the exam.....and they still fail (no clue why i said that). But these people are lucky because they gave such an impression they studied and so parents dont kill them.
Me on the other hand...one look of my dumb (fabulous) smiling face after i fail a test just makes them want to punch my teeth off.
7.The Legend:
*drumroll* This person who can never choose to see. He chooses to see you. You would have seen him for the first few days of college. After that he would have just cut a few classes a day, then a few days a week, and then a few weeks a month. Infact when you see him enter the class (maybe because of a power cut at his house) There will be a shocked silence in class and people all start whispering amongst themselves (and some people asking "who is he?. Shit! hes our class?!") Buuut We all have this admiration for him during exams. We all standing there scared, wearing our formals with neat haircuts and revising with every second we have. (like its going to make a difference) Whereas this dude is just standing there hungover with jeans...crocs...long hair and a beard. While you guys revising he'll be playing clash of clans with an even more intense expression......ironically he'll pass the exam. Dont ask me how
Dont go anywhere because ill be back with.....
*Part 2* Scenarios which happen in college....coming soon
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